Teaching children about teamwork, winning, and being successful is a very difficult task for a coach and a parent. What I am seeing, is children don't seem to truly understand sacrifice and do not have self-drive. What we are finding is a lot of entitlement and little humility in young players generally speaking. When we ask parents why, they tell us they want them to experience life before they have to work for the rest of it. Half or more ask the kids, what they want to do instead of allowing them to "want/need/must-have" something bad enough that they ask to do it. Then they put them in a lot of different programs for short periods of time. In my opinion, that is a lot of multi-tasking of things they never really asked for. It is no wonder so many of them are diagnosed with ADHD. So I am asking each of you the same thing I asked myself, what are the costs and gains from doing this?
Up until the mid 20th century, the majority of children had to work in the fields or doing odd jobs with their parents in the cities before and after school. When they got the chance to play something they truly enjoyed it. There was also less distractions and little transparency between the social classes. What kids learned from working back then was sacrifice. What they gained from it was self-drive, work ethic, and character. They also learned the value of their free time (or at least the majority did).
In today's society there are more distractions and more transparency between the social classes. Children also have more free time, and besides some families requiring chores, there isn't much to challenge them. Most will agree, that today's Public Schools have even become less challenging. In general and because of the major paradigm shift, children never get perspective and begin to gain a false sense of being entitled. I see more parents wanting to be their child's friend, rather than parenting them. Is that really a smart choice in the long run? How can you experience something without first having perspective and then valuing it?
Ultimately parenting and coaching are subjective. Both are about choice, but you have to remember we are all a part of the same societies (force multiples) and living on the same rock in space. Making responsible choices as a parent and as a coach is critical. In the animal kingdom, if a bear or tiger parent chose to be their cub's friend instead of teaching them survival skills and strategic predator values, they would lose their instincts and sharpness at the cost of their life. Certainly we are on the intelligence end of the animal kingdom (not just survival), but we still need to make sure our kids stay sharp, learn social skills, have great instincts, appreciate what they have, and value their (and others) time.
Teamwork is about humility, trust, and sacrifice for one and other. Winning is about knowing the difference between want, need, and must have. HINT: When you must have it and you sail to the other team's island to challenge, you get off on the island then burn the boats. Lastly success is about a lot of things and doesn't come without failure, so to have a successful outcome is when you've learned to take positive actions from your failures (hopefully quickly) =Fail-Fast. Thank you.
Up until the mid 20th century, the majority of children had to work in the fields or doing odd jobs with their parents in the cities before and after school. When they got the chance to play something they truly enjoyed it. There was also less distractions and little transparency between the social classes. What kids learned from working back then was sacrifice. What they gained from it was self-drive, work ethic, and character. They also learned the value of their free time (or at least the majority did).
In today's society there are more distractions and more transparency between the social classes. Children also have more free time, and besides some families requiring chores, there isn't much to challenge them. Most will agree, that today's Public Schools have even become less challenging. In general and because of the major paradigm shift, children never get perspective and begin to gain a false sense of being entitled. I see more parents wanting to be their child's friend, rather than parenting them. Is that really a smart choice in the long run? How can you experience something without first having perspective and then valuing it?
Ultimately parenting and coaching are subjective. Both are about choice, but you have to remember we are all a part of the same societies (force multiples) and living on the same rock in space. Making responsible choices as a parent and as a coach is critical. In the animal kingdom, if a bear or tiger parent chose to be their cub's friend instead of teaching them survival skills and strategic predator values, they would lose their instincts and sharpness at the cost of their life. Certainly we are on the intelligence end of the animal kingdom (not just survival), but we still need to make sure our kids stay sharp, learn social skills, have great instincts, appreciate what they have, and value their (and others) time.
Teamwork is about humility, trust, and sacrifice for one and other. Winning is about knowing the difference between want, need, and must have. HINT: When you must have it and you sail to the other team's island to challenge, you get off on the island then burn the boats. Lastly success is about a lot of things and doesn't come without failure, so to have a successful outcome is when you've learned to take positive actions from your failures (hopefully quickly) =Fail-Fast. Thank you.
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